How to Solve a Problem
Every person on Earth should have faced and will face problems; the issues have been part of our everyday lives since early humans were trying to find food and water and protect their families. Though I am sure that every single group has had their own problems to face, only those who succeeded in solving their problems or learnt to adapt are the ones who survived and gave their descendant the chance to continue living and build the modern civilisation as we know it.
As modern civilisation has become more advanced, our modern life problems have become more complicated regardless of their size. Now, we need to manage our modern lives emotionally and financially daily; otherwise, we could face challenges that could break down our lives. As a ship in the sea your life will be, but only the best captains who know how to survive the strong storms, learn how to be a good captain if you don’t want to spend your life in a safe harbour.
This article will not give you the magic wand to solve your problems, but it will guide you through a proven technique I have used for over 30 years to solve my and others' problems. I can guarantee that this technique helped me and many others make their lives easier.
If you are still reading, you could be saying let’s get to the point and tell us your fancy problem-solving technique. Ok, let me start, and as a pragmatic man, I will do it in the most practical way.
1- Identify the problem
Many of us may have several problems that affect our lives, and because of the confusion, we might be unable to be specific about the real problem. Imagine your problem as a tree with leaves, branches, stems, and roots; please temporarily try to ignore all the tree’s parts except one part, the roots. Many problems, if you think deeply about them, you find they are just secondary problems born out of a main one, which itself is a branch of a bigger one, and so on. Finding and identifying the Alien mothership will save time-fighting thousands of tiny UFOs, dig deep and try not to be distracted. Focussing on multiple problems same time or the failure of identifying the core problem will make us go round in circles, i am not saying ignore your minor problems but to start with the biggest one will make solving others easier.
For example, if you have a new problem in your relationship with your wife, problems at work, or problems with your children, the real problem could be one of them or something hidden in your mind, something you don’t dare confess but you have to, which leads us to the next point.
2- Be honest and face yourself.
If you want to solve your problem, never lie to yourself, and be honest. Honesty is the key to solutions, so always appreciate the benefits of having a brave and open discussion with yourself. You can’t fool yourself when you play chess against yourself, so if you want to solve your problems from the roots, simply face yourself and dig deep inside your mind until you find the real problem.
From my experience, this could take days, and you need courage to tell yourself the truth about the root of the problem. People may try to escape being honest with themselves to cover up the truth of the real problem; this could temporarily make them feel safe, but it doesn’t cancel the fact that the ship is full of holes and if we didn’t confess this in front of ourselves don’t blame anyone for a rapid sinking.
Remember that your mind will always try to protect you and try to distract you from your fears so get prepared for this.
I know the truth hurts, but lying to ourselves will hurt more, so be brave and tell yourself the truth. It doesn’t matter how ugly your reality is. Don’t feel ashamed if your problem is embarrassing, a bad habit or even dangerous thinking. Don’t judge yourself. On the contrary, praise yourself for the great courage you showed to face yourself before taking action to fix your problem. Believe me, if you finish the first steps as they should, you are halfway through the long way.
3- Put realistic and possible solutions.
Now that you have bravely identified the root problem in your life, it is time to put some possible solutions in place to fix your issue.
If you want my advice to get the most out of this step, try to be realistic as much as possible as follows:
Think deeply about practical solutions, not just one.
Be prepared and flexible if we fail Plan A and, if possible, go to Plan B or C.
The solutions examples could be general, like working on yourself to improve existing good habits, behaviour control, confessing the truth to someone, financial decisions, bad habits you need to get rid of, or facing your partner about something wrong with you or them.
Make most of your solutions measurable so you can assess your progress more specifically. For example, instead of saying I will eat less junk food or drink less, put a specific number you want to reach each week until you reach your goal so you can measure your progress realistically.
Try to make your solutions more sustainable to ensure your problem will be solved permanently. For example if you want to lose weight think bigger, instead of changing the diet change your life style, though it is harder it is more sustainable and greater benefits you will get.
Not all solutions will be comfortable, and it will require extra bravery to talk to others if they are part of the problem. Still, once we decide to fix our lives, we know we should have a price to pay to make our lives better.
Remember that hiding the dust under the carpet will never make your house clean; uncovering the dust and cleaning it will solve the problem. It doesn’t matter how much effort and challenges we face to reach our goals, but it is worth it, making our lives cleaner and better again.
Decision-making is much easier than conducting them, so our next step is to determine how we will apply our solutions to the real world.
4- Actions and support
We have done our homework and made realistic and practical plans to fix our problems,now it is time to act, but how can we do this?
Start softly, and don’t make tough decisions immediately.
Talk to the people around you to get their support.
Share your plan with a person who is part of your plan or someone you trust.
Never give up if you fail the first time.
Seek professional or medical help if you need them.
Be flexible as hell and make any necessary changes to your plan.
Put small goals you need to finish in your way to achieve your final one.
Right down your progress to compare your achievements during your journey; sometimes, when we lose control, we need to look back at the times we did things right to correct our route.
Remember that a hundred stairs start with one step, so be patient.
There is no such 100% successful plan, and all plans need to be modified to succeed at some stage.
Review your progress continuously and make any necessary decisions to steer the boat back in the right direction.
Cut or put a hold on your relationship with anyone you think will stop you from solving your problem.
Don’t listen to negative comments; listen to the right people.
Share your tiny successes with people you trust to give you more support in your journey.
5- What if results
Since humans dwelled on the earth, they have succeeded and failed; it is part of our human nature. Failing doesn’t make you a loser, but giving up or never trying to improve does. Let’s discuss the two expected scenarios after you finish your journey to solving your problem.
You failed:
Though you failed to achieve your goal, your experience in solving your problem must have added something to you; familiarity with practical thinking is a priceless experience.
Study each step you have taken closely, be honest with yourself, and try to find the most important answer to the big question: Why did I fail? Is it the plan, is it me, or is it an external factor?
If you think you can try again and take control of the reasons for the failure, do it.
If you think you can’t try again never give up but this time, ask for help from someone, a family member, professional, a doctor but never surrender.
Remind yourself why you started all of this and how your life will be better if you reach your goal, so don’t stop and try again.
You succeeded:
Hurray! You have not only fixed your problem but also learned the techniques that will help you resolve any other problems in the future.
Celebrate your success, but remember to be vigilant so you don’t lose control again.
If you changed a habit or added a new healthy behaviour to your life deal with that as a new part of your lifestyle rather than a temporary change.
Thank everyone who helped you, if any, and share the good news with them; they will be your true mirror if you lose control again.
Try to apply this technique to one of your problems and see how it works.
Don’t hesitate to contact me if you want any help, email me or book my 30-minute free session if you feel it will be useful.
photo
https://pixabay.com/users/iffany-6128830/
